Five superhero movies, four animated films, three $300 million blockbusters, two Brendan Fraser movies and one partridge in a pear tree later, summer 2008 is finally winding down.
What was the best of the summer season? Forget rankings or official lists — we decided instead to hand out a whole slew of crazy awards to our favorite moments, performances and movies from the past three months.
Summer's Biggest Hero, Inanimate Object Division
The refrigerator. Not only does a fridge shield Indiana Jones from a nuclear blast, thereby saving his life, but a fridge also protects a plant in "Wall-E," signaling to humans that the planet is ready for mankind's return.
Summer's Biggest Villain, Inanimate Object Division
The pencil. Used by the Joker in "The Dark Knight" for his "magic trick," and by an extra to commit suicide in "The Happening," the writing utensil has more confirmed kills than "Hulk" villain Emil Blonsky and "Iron Man" villain Obadiah Stane combined.
Best Performance, Comedy
James Franco, for his stoner-turned-action-hero Saul in "Pineapple Express."
Best Robert Downey Jr.-Assisted Cameo, "Tropic Thunder" Division
In a movie chock full of cameos, Tobey Maguire gets the biggest laughs alongside Robert Downey Jr.'s Kirk Lazarus as a gay medieval monk in a trailer for the fake movie "Satan's Alley."
Best Robert Downey Jr.-Assisted Cameo, Non-"Tropic Thunder" Division
Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark at the end of "The Incredible Hulk." This scene (which director Louis Leterrier called "the first shot of 'The Avengers' ") also doubles as the best setup in recent memory.
Most Inexplicable Trend
Sending animals to space in animated movies, seen twice within a month with the releases of "Space Chimps" and "Fly Me to the Moon."
Idea That You Thought Was Going to Be Lame, But Turned Out to Be Awesome
The Joker explaining his backstory in "The Dark Knight."
Idea That You Thought Was Going to Be Awesome, But Turned Out to Be Lame
Karen Allen returning as Marion Ravenwood in "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull."
The "I Bet You Didn't Know I Was a Box-Office Record Breaker" Award
"Mamma Mia," which will soon surpass "Grease" as the highest grossing musical in history.
Most Intentionally Funny Cultural Stereotype
John Turturro's deliciously over-the-top performance as Palestinian terrorist the Phantom in "You Don't Mess With the Zohan."
Most Unintentionally Funny Cultural Stereotype
The ambiguously gay Hutt, Ziro, in "Star Wars: The Clone Wars."
Best Dismissive Attitude Toward a Character's History
Agent Scully, whose child is done away with in one line of dialogue from "The X-Files: I Want to Believe."
Biggest Fall for a 2007 Oscar Nominee in the Category of Best Supporting Actor (Runner Up)
Mark Wahlberg, for talking to a plant, realizing he's talking to a plant, and then continuing to talk to a plant in "The Happening."
Biggest Fall for a 2007 Oscar Nominee in the Category of Best Supporting Actor
Eddie Murphy, for all of "Meet Dave."
Best Two Minutes of the Summer
A drunken Hellboy joining a heartbroken Abe Sapien to sing Barry Manilow's "Can't Smile Without You" in "Hellboy II: The Golden Army."
Worst Two Minutes of the Summer
Mutt Williams (Shia LaBeouf) swinging through the jungle like Tarzan in "Indiana Jones."
Most Human Romance
The love between Wall-E and Eve — two robots — in "Wall-E."
Funniest Quote of the Summer
Seth Rogen's Dale, about a particularly pungent batch of weed: "It smells like God's vagina" from "Pineapple Express."
Most Unexpected, But Much Welcome, Comeback
Woody Allen, who is receiving strong reviews and even Oscar talk for "Vicky Cristina Barcelona," his first really great movie in years.
Most Unexpected, But Much Welcome, Failure
Mike Myers, who had a massive misfire with "The Love Guru."
Best Movie Not Yet Mentioned
"Kung Fu Panda"
The Poochiest, Most Unnecessary Character Added to an Already Beloved Franchise For No Sane Reason Other Than to Appeal to Younger Viewers Only to be Universally Hated — Bronze Medal
Jennifer Hudson's character, Louise, in "Sex and the City."
The Poochiest, Most Unnecessary Character Added to an Already Beloved Franchise For No Sane Reason Other Than to Appeal to Younger Viewers Only to be Universally Hated — Silver Medal
Shia LaBeouf's character, Mutt Williams, in "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull."
The Poochiest, Most Unnecessary Character Added to an Already Beloved Franchise For No Sane Reason Other Than to Appeal to Younger Viewers Only to be Universally Hated Award — Gold Medal
Ahsoka Tana, Anakin Skywalker's spunky Padawan learner in "Star Wars: The Clone Wars."
Best Performance, Drama
Heath Ledger, for his definitive portrayal of the Joker in "The Dark Knight."
The "I Guess I Picked the Wrong Week to Quit Acid" Award
"Speed Racer," which assaulted the senses with video game visuals, quick cuts, cartoon colors and clunky dialogue.
The Most Unnecessary Romantic Subplot (Runner Up)
The non-canonical relationship between Prince Caspian and Susie in "The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian."
The Most Unnecessary Romantic Subplot
Charlize Theron and Will Smith in "Hancock," who are revealed to be ancient, immortal lovers.
Best Superhero Beatdown
When Iron Man, using his suit for the first time, raids a terrorist camp, killing several shooters with his computerized targeting system before leaving the last one for the villagers to take care of themselves.
Best Movie Nobody Saw
"Man on Wire," a documentary about tightrope walker Philippe Petit's high-wire routine performed between the Twin Towers.
Best Movie Everybody Saw
"The Dark Knight"
Best Movie Some People Saw, Brendan Fraser Division
"The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor," slightly above "Journey to the Center of the Earth."
Agree or disagree with our choices? Got some of your own? Sound off below.
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